My name is Conrad Planta, and I’m finally leaving Parkdale. You might’ve seen me or talked to me and might’ve noticed that I can NOT have a conversation with others for the life of me. There are many factors that contributed to this, such as the COVID pandemic, which created this awkward mess that I am.
I used to be a talkative person before the pandemic. I could chat with others or strike up conversations with people, no problem. However, after being stuck in the house for so long and only talking to family every day, my social skills plummeted horrendously. Holding eye contact was difficult, small talk was painful, and group work was a nightmare.
According to an article written by Molly Chiu in Baylor College of Medicine, “the pandemic has made us more reliant on technology and virtual communication, which has made us more efficient in some ways,” Dr. Eric Storch, professor and vice chair in the Menninger Department of Psychiatry and Behavioral Sciences, said “but the negative with virtual communication is that sometimes we’re not getting the same level of gratification that we would get from in-person interactions. It can limit opportunities to feel connected.”
Even after returning to in-person learning, I couldn’t find a way to go back to my old chatty self. I had many people try to talk to me, from strangers to classmates to teachers. Starting a conversation with me always ended with me saying a few sentences and completely going silent, my mind going completely blank. In addition, I also wanted to say something, but I never knew how to convey it correctly.
Some teachers had noticed my behavior and had talked to my counselor, which led to them calling my parents, and then led to therapy. Receiving mental aid helped a lot with regaining my confidence in speaking, and I encourage anyone with this developing problem, or any problem in general, to get help as well.
I’m thankful for the classmates who didn’t make things weird when I couldn’t keep a conversation going and to the teachers who checked on me even when I didn’t have much to say. Thank you.
I don’t know if I’ll ever go back to being the loud kid I once was, but I’ve learned that being quiet doesn’t mean I have nothing to say. And maybe college, or whatever comes next, is where I finally figure out how to say it.
